As always, I am deeply moved whenever I am reminded of the sacrifices made for me and my freedoms.  I would never ask for anyone to give up their life for mine, and so I am grateful for those who have and for those who were willing.  This video is more than just touching.  It is beautiful.  Thank you to all of those who have sacrificed for my freedoms.

(You can watch it here, but it will be bigger if you watch it directly on YouTube)

So today I went onto a website to read an article about a new word Sarah Palin said: “refudiate” (should have been refute or repudiate).

The article was not that interesting.  The story has no bearing on anything.  But the hatred and rhetoric in the comments were absolutely ridiculous.

People are so quick to judge others, and they’re even more quick to vilify anyone that doesn’t agree with them or share the same labels.

I wish people would calm down and try to understand each other better.  The majority of people in the USA want the same things.  If we could just have some good honest conversations about what we want and how to get there I think we actually could get there.  Unfortunately, the hate, fear-mongering, contempt, and blindness stifle any kind of productive communication.

Has anyone else noticed how guilt-ridden our world is these days?

Guilt seems to be one of the top driving forces.  I want you to do something, so I guilt you into doing it.  You feel guilty, so you do it, even though you’d rather not.

What a pathetic and pitiful way to live–for both the guilter and the guilty.

The worst part is that so many of us don’t realize it’s happening, but know something is not right when it does.

What is truth?

In my opinion, truth is the way things are.  There is only one truth.  Everyone may disagree on what it is, but that doesn’t mean there are multiple versions of it.  The earth, for example, was created somehow.  It was created once and in only one way.  We may never know the truth of how it was created, and we may all disagree on it, but there is a truth.  And there is only one truth.

In my mind, the search for truth should not be consumed with tearing down other beliefs.  Truth should stand on its own and persuade people of its veracity by the pure fact that it is there.  And dwelling on why something is wrong is not searching for truth either.  If it is not truth, then why dwell there.  Look somewhere else for the truth.

On a related topic…

I have always said that true religion and true science are the same thing.

In fact, the purpose of both religion and science are the same: to find truth.  They approach their search for truth in different ways, but each still focuses on finding truth.

And because there is only one truth, if they could both uncover the truth, they would both support the same truth and therefore each other.  That’s why I say true religion and true science are the same thing.  For more on this topic, you can read my post titled “Truth In Fiction – Volume 1″.

As I have read novels throughout my life, I have realized that many of my favorite authors have a keen understanding of reality and truth.  Their stories are woven around the truth as they believe it to be.  In many instances I share their beliefs.

The book I am currently reading has bits of what I consider to be truth littered throughout it’s pages.  It is the sixth book of Terry Goodkind’s “The Sword of Truth” series, entitled Faith of the Fallen.  Following are some of my favorite quotes from the book.

Page 21:

“The only sovereign I can allow to rule me is reason.  The first law of reason is this: what exists, exists; what is, is.  From this irreducible, bedrock principle, all knowledge is built.  This is the foundation from which life is embraced.

“Reason is a choice.  Wishes and whims are not facts, nor are they a means to discovering them.  Reason is our only way of grasping reality–it’s our basic tool of survival.  We are free to evade the effort of thinking, to reject reason, but we are not free to avoid the penalty of the abyss we refuse to see.”

It has always been my belief that truth exists.  Things are the way they are.  There is only one correct answer.

Whether we accept or find the truth is something else entirely.  Just because I do not believe something is true does not mean it is false.  Truth is truth.  It is independent of desire, faith, understanding, acceptance, or pretense.  It is my goal to seek truth where I can find it.

That is why I have always said that true religion and true science are the same.  Religion and science are two different methods of uncovering truth.  In the end, science will prove the truth of true religion.

Page 460 (expands on the first quote):

“The most important rule there is…the only sovereign you can allow to rule you is reason.

“…It is not only the most important rule, but the simplest.  Nonetheless, it is the one most often ignored and violated, and by far the most despised.  It must be wielded in spite of the ceaseless, howling protests of the wicked.

“Misery, iniquity, and utter destruction lurk in the shadows outside its full light, where half-truths snare the faithful disciples, the deeply feeling believers, the selfless followers.

“Faith and feelings are the warm marrow of evil.  Unlike reason, faith and feelings provide no boundary to limit any delusion, any whim.  They are a virulent poison, giving the numbing illusion of moral sanction to every depravity ever hatched.

“Faith and feelings are the darkness to reason’s light.

“Reason is the very substance of truth itself.  The glory that is life is wholly embraced through reason, through this rule.  In rejecting it, in rejecting reason, one embraces death.”

The only thing I would add to this description is the importance of recognizing that our own reasoning abilities are not perfect.  That is why I believe a merging of our own reason, mixed with our faith and feelings, with inspiration from God, is the only way to find with any certainty truth in this life.

Is He Into You?

Good question.  It’s a question that gets asked by both sides about the opposite sex.

It seems to me that in our society we have a hard time making up our minds.  We’re always looking for the next best thing, the next exciting thing, the next attractive thing.  This also carries over to our romantic relationships.  Oftentimes we are too caught up thinking about the next person we’ll meet or see that we fail to fully engage with the ones we see right now.  (I am guilty of this also).

I know a girl that can’t tell if a guy is into her.  She told me the signs, what he’s doing, why she thinks he might be interested…  He flirts with her, he finds random excuses to talk to her, she often catches him looking at her.

She also mentioned the other signs why he may not be into her…  He never asks her out; she’s invited him a few times to hangout and he always has an excuse.

She’s having a hard time deciding if he’s into her or not.  Should she hope for a relationship with him or just forget about him and move on?  It can be a frustrating situation to be in.

Is He Into You?

In my opinion, if a guy is interested, he will pursue.  That means he’ll ask her out or find ways to spend time with her.  He’ll get her phone number and communicate with her through text or phone calls.  If you work with him, he will find reasons to hang out with you outside of work.  These are all ways that guys show they are interested.  If he doesn’t do these things, it means (in almost every situation) that he is not interested.

If he was interested, he would make it obvious.

But what about the flirting, the looks, the random questions or excuses to talk, etc.?

They are good signs, no doubt, but are not enough.  Many guys (and girls) like to flirt.  They can be attracted physically, emotionally, or intellectually.  Because of these attractions, they may give you attention.  But if they are not trying to move the relationship to a deeper level than just flirting, they are probably not interested in doing so.  If they were, they would do it.

Now I know there are exceptions out there.  We learn about them in the movie “He’s Just Not That Into You.”  But that’s what they are: exceptions.

Is He Into You?

If you are really frustrated and need to know for sure one way or the other, I suggest confronting the guy and asking him.  Say something like this:  “Hey I’ve noticed you’re sending me a lot of mixed signals; I can’t tell if you’re interested in pursuing a relationship or just flirting for fun.  Which is it?”

Then the guy can let you know.  This could potentially make the situation awkward, but won’t if you don’t let it.  If he’s interested in pursuing a relationship, then great; good thing you asked.  If he’s not, well, at least you know, and now you can move on.

People are like flowers.  There are no two that are exactly the same, yet each is as beautiful, brilliant, and complex as the next.

The human experience is like the life cycle of a flower.  Its birth and death do not diminish its beauty.  And even in death, its delicate beauty can still be seen.

Blue Lily

I had two conversations tonight that touched on being picky.  Why is it that “picky” has such a negative connotation?

I found this picture of me being picky.

Picky is a word that many people have used to describe me (including myself).  And it is most often used when talking about members of the opposite sex.

I am told I shouldn’t be so picky; that I need to lower my standards; that I’ll never find someone because my expectations are unreal.

To all those people who think picky is a four letter word, I’d like to give you my opinion of why picky is not only okay, it’s the perfect way to be.

Here I am being picky again.

What does picky mean? According to Merriam-Webster, picky is “fussy, or choosy.”  Choosy means “fastidiously selective” or “particular,”  and one of the multiple definitions of fussy is “requiring or giving close attention to details.”  When looking for a mate, both of these are qualities worth having.

I expect my future companion to stimulate me on many levels.  The first of these is physical attraction.  I must be attracted physically, and it needs to be a strong attraction.  If this attraction is not there, the likelihood I’ll try looking for the other levels of attraction is not very good.

The second is intellectual attraction.  If she is boring, you can’t expect me to pursue her.

Wow I am so picky

The third is emotional attraction.  If she doesn’t have any emotions (or has too many), you can’t expect me to be interested.

The fourth (and possibly the most important) is spiritual attraction.  Not only must she have similar beliefs as me, they must also be important to her as mine are to me.  If we don’t match in this area, a future is likely impossible.

I normally sum all of these up by saying I have two requirements: (1) that she be attractive (2) that I want to spend time with her.  It is not my fault that I can’t find girls that match these criteria.  But I hope you can understand why I feel a future companion should.

I'm even picky when I'm on my phone

In my mind, being picky is recognizing the options that are out there, evaluating them against what you are looking for, and dismissing the options that do not fit your criteria.  If this is picky, then I wholeheartedly and with enthusiasm embrace my pickiness.

I don’t think it would be fair to be with someone I didn’t adore–or to feel like I’ve settled.  It wouldn’t be fair to me, and it would definitely not be fair to her.

This post may sound harsh to some.  It is not my intent to be harsh, only to tell the truth as I see it–the truth as I feel it.

I can’t let what other people think or say drag me down.  When other people laugh at my dreams or make fun of my ambitions, I just shrug it off.  It can be hard (especially if it’s family or friends), but it is necessary.

What I am doing is important to me.  That is all that matters.

Someday I’ll find a girl that thinks like I think.  I want to share my page with someone, and I don’t want to have to explain it to her.  I think that is what is known as “clicking”.  I want to “click”.  I’m sure someday I will, but of course I’m okay with waiting.  When it happens, it will be that much sweeter because of the wait.

Here is a picture of me waiting…

Here I am waiting

I got a text from a friend yesterday, and he was frustrated with where he is in life.  He wants to escape, even though that’s probably not the most prudent thing he could do.

I suggested that he bear with it for a while longer.  I also told him that it wouldn’t last forever.

I also think it’s important to remember that part of what makes life beautiful are the things that are ugly.  Our beautiful experiences are enhanced by the ugliness we are asked to endure.

I told him:

“just think…
when you get where you wanna be,
it will be that much sweeter
because you were here”

I’ve realized in my life that the ugly and bad help to accentuate the beautiful and good–without them, the beautiful wouldn’t be as bright.