Is He Into You?
Good question. It’s a question that gets asked by both sides about the opposite sex.
It seems to me that in our society we have a hard time making up our minds. We’re always looking for the next best thing, the next exciting thing, the next attractive thing. This also carries over to our romantic relationships. Oftentimes we are too caught up thinking about the next person we’ll meet or see that we fail to fully engage with the ones we see right now. (I am guilty of this also).
I know a girl that can’t tell if a guy is into her. She told me the signs, what he’s doing, why she thinks he might be interested… He flirts with her, he finds random excuses to talk to her, she often catches him looking at her.
She also mentioned the other signs why he may not be into her… He never asks her out; she’s invited him a few times to hangout and he always has an excuse.
She’s having a hard time deciding if he’s into her or not. Should she hope for a relationship with him or just forget about him and move on? It can be a frustrating situation to be in.
Is He Into You?
In my opinion, if a guy is interested, he will pursue. That means he’ll ask her out or find ways to spend time with her. He’ll get her phone number and communicate with her through text or phone calls. If you work with him, he will find reasons to hang out with you outside of work. These are all ways that guys show they are interested. If he doesn’t do these things, it means (in almost every situation) that he is not interested.
If he was interested, he would make it obvious.
But what about the flirting, the looks, the random questions or excuses to talk, etc.?
They are good signs, no doubt, but are not enough. Many guys (and girls) like to flirt. They can be attracted physically, emotionally, or intellectually. Because of these attractions, they may give you attention. But if they are not trying to move the relationship to a deeper level than just flirting, they are probably not interested in doing so. If they were, they would do it.
Now I know there are exceptions out there. We learn about them in the movie “He’s Just Not That Into You.” But that’s what they are: exceptions.
Is He Into You?
If you are really frustrated and need to know for sure one way or the other, I suggest confronting the guy and asking him. Say something like this: “Hey I’ve noticed you’re sending me a lot of mixed signals; I can’t tell if you’re interested in pursuing a relationship or just flirting for fun. Which is it?”
Then the guy can let you know. This could potentially make the situation awkward, but won’t if you don’t let it. If he’s interested in pursuing a relationship, then great; good thing you asked. If he’s not, well, at least you know, and now you can move on.
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